Happy 2 week Birthday Justin!!

Justin is two weeks old today. Wow, it seems like the longest two weeks of my life! It is almost just a blur of events. We are now adjusting to life at home with 4 children. So far, adding Justin to the mix has not been too much of an adjustment. The kids are doing great with Justin, even Sadie loves being around Justin.

The first two nights we had Justin home he had alarms. The first night was a low heart rate alarm, which is probably not too big a deal. The second night he had an apnea alarm, which means he did not breathe for 20 secs. As soon as the alarm went off we gently stimulated him and he quickly took a breath. His face was pale, but the color came back quickly. He has not had an alarm since then. We expect to have this monitor for 6 wks - 2 months at least. I am thankful we have it, and try not to dwell on what "could be."

Justin had his first dr. appt on Wed. He weighed 5 lb 11 oz and the doctor said he looked good. We went in Friday for a weight check and he was 5 lb 13 oz, so he gained about an ounce a day which is what they want to see. He will be going in 2 weeks for his one month check up.

Justin is eating well and getting stronger (and more vocal!) everyday. Please continue to pray that Justin will not have anymore apnea spells and that he will continue to gain weight. Thanks for all the prayers, we have definitely felt them at work!

Getting his first bath at home. Big Brother Jonathan watching as Nana bathed him. Justin was not to happy about the bath!

Justin and Papa's first picture together. This was also Papa's first time holding Justin! He didn't get to hold him before he was sent to the NICU.

Proud Big Brother Jase! He loves Justin and always wants to hold him.

Justin and cousin Malachi. They are almost 5 months apart. I am sure they will be best friends one day!

Justin is Home!!

I've waited nine long days to be able to post this news! Justin came home with Nate and I today. We left the hospital this afternoon around 1:30 and have just been relaxing at home since then. The kids were thrilled to come home from school and find Justin here. Jase loves his new baby and wants to hold him all the time. I will have to keep a close eye on him when he is around Justin! Justin is doing great, he has been sleeping all day and eating well. He has a doctor appt tomorrow with Dr. Gaines. Once I see that he is still gaining weight (he weighed 5 lb 10.5 oz last night) then I will be able to relax a little more. I am hoping that I will finally be able to sleep tonight since he is here with me.

This picture is from Sunday night when he was still under the bili lights. He loved sleeping under those lights!

Today, dressed in his going home outfit.

Our first family picture with Justin! This was at our welcome home party for Justin. A family of six, finally together.

Thank you to everyone who has been praying. Now that I have him home I probably won't be updating the blog as often! I will make sure I at least post an update every few days. Please continue to keep us in your prayers.

Maybe Tomorrow . . .

I feel like this is what I hear every time I go to see Justin. Hopefully tomorrow, if everything goes well tonight, he can go home tomorrow. I guess eventually they will be right. I am really hoping that tomorrow really will be the day that I get to bring him home. Tomorrow will be day 9 in the NICU.

He seemed well today. His jaundice level was down to 8 this morning so they took him off the lights. He is eating well, and he nursed twice while I was visiting today. He has not had anymore apnea episodes that caused a drop in heart rate. This is the main thing they are watching for now and said as long as he has no episodes between now and tomorrow that he can come home. I am praying that he has a quiet night, and that tonight is the last night he is away from home. Nate and I had our training on the monitor and CPR. I was a little emotional when having the training. It was very overwhelming thinking about having to do CPR on your own baby.

I will update tomorrow. Hopefully I will be posting pics of Justin coming home!

A quick update

I am going to make this short, I am so tired! We visited Justin twice today, as usual. He is doing very well with his eating. His weight was down to 5 lb 9 oz tonight, but with the way he is eating I think it will be back up by tomorrow. He has been under the lights for his jaundice since last night. I expect those to be discontinued by tomorrow morning. Nate and I should be getting our CPR and monitor training sometime tomorrow. He has continued to have episodes of his O2 sats dropping while sleeping, but did not have any episodes of his heart rate dropping today. Every day is different and sometimes he may have days of his heart rate dropping several times and other days it may not happen at all. That is why he will be on the monitor and it will help decrease our anxiety somewhat, knowing that if his heart rate drops we will be alerted.

I am really hoping that we may get to bring him home tomorrow night, but we will have to wait until he is evaluated in the morning by the doctor. Please keep our whole family in your prayers. Jonathan and Jessi seem stressed and emotional right now. I think they are ready for things to get back to normal. Jase is a little confused but over all he is doing fine. The last 7 days have been very stressful, and we are all ready to have our family at home together! I'll let you know how things are looking tomorrow.

It's a Minor Problem. . .

They promise it's just the way things go in the NICU. Justin was doing great. Feeding tube gone, IV tube gone, latched on and nursing. Up to 30 cc's at a feeding (1 ounce). Oxygen, respirations, and heart rate all looking good. We had almost forgotten that one brief incident of apnea he had a couple of days ago.

When I arrived at the NICU today his nurse relayed how he had not been as eager to eat, was very sleepy, and his jaundice reading had increased to 12. Well, I thought, jaundice does tend to make babies more lethargic--should begin to improve by tomorrow. As Justin fell asleep in my lap the the nurse begins watching the screen more intently as the beeping and screen activity increases--especially Justin's heart rate dropping into the 70's and once into the 50's while sleeping. The heart rate should be at least 100 at rest, and I would prefer closer to 120. While smiling and talking to me she snatched Justin from my lap and began a gentle rock and shake motion, and, of course, his heart rate returned to normal.

The nurse said Justin had tried that same trick with her a couple of time that morning, She began to paint the picture for me. . .a change from what we had thought. A septic workup will be done to check for any underlying infection that could be causing the problem. If he doesn't resume eating, the feeding tube will have to be reinserted. He will be put on an apnea/heart monitor which will come home with us. Nate and I will be trained on the monitor and in infant CPR. (It's been six years since my last CPR training.)

Needless to say, our Sunday discharge has been delayed. We are going back tonight and taking Jonathan and Jessi to see their baby brother. Jase is staying home with Papa.

Maybe by the middle of next week our whole family can be at home--apnea monitor and all.

My first pictures with no tubes!

Proud Nana!

I got moved to a big boy bed!!

Justin is Eating!!

I got to breastfeed Justin for the first time today! He latched on and nursed for about 8 minutes the first time and then after a short nap he nursed for about 6-7 minutes. He stayed nice and calm the whole time, respiratory rate stayed in the 40's and O2 sats stayed above 95 %. His IV fluids are being decreased and should be off by tomorrow morning. Our plan right now is for me to go for the regular 2 visits tomorrow and then go up Sunday morning and stay until he leaves. If I go on Sunday and he feeds well all day then he should be discharged about 4 or 5 that afternoon. I am very excited but trying not to get my hopes up too much. Any little setback could another day or two to his stay. Right now we are just being hopeful for Sunday. Thanks for the prayers! I'll keep you updated.

Looking Good!!

Sorry this took so long to post! So, last Justin was having some issues with digesting his feedings. When I was there at 9 pm he had 9 cc of residual in his stomach from his 6 pm feeding, which was 8 cc. He also had a lot of air in his stomach. During the night his feeding were decreased to only 5 cc and he had an x-ray ordered for this morning of his stomach. I talked with the nurse this morning and his x-ray was normal and he tolerated his decreased feedings during the night. This was all good news. Sometimes the digestive system is just a little slow in getting started.

When I visited today they were going to up his feedings to 10 cc and increase by 2 cc every other feeding. At the same time they will decrease his IV rate by 2 cc every other feeding. If everything goes well he should be off IV fluids by tomorrow afternoon. When I last spoke with the nurse he had not had any residual from his last two feedings. Currently all of his feedings are being done through the tube, but hopefully we will be able to start with oral feedings tomorrow. He also had the cannula taken off, so we can finally see that cute face!! They took the feeding tube out of his mouth and put it in his nose since the cannula is now gone. He also had the IV taken out of his head and put into his arm. He looked so good when we saw him this morning. I put in some pics of him with his eyes open. If everything continues to improve he may get to come home this weekend. He is a touch jaundice, so pray that that will resolve quickly and not worsen. We are all very hopeful that by Sunday our little Justin will be home with his family. We appreciate all the prayers, keep them coming!!

Listening to my Daddy talk.

I look like my big brother Jonathan!

I look good without all those tubes!!

Justin is Chillin'

We think Justin is a little more relaxed--what do you think?



We visited him this afternoon and found out that the high-flow oxygen had been turned off since 10:00 a.m. this morning. His oxygen saturation's were 95-98%--the highest since birth (good). His respiration rate was consistently in the 40's--the lowest since birth (also good). The combination of these two stats leads everyone (all the nurses) to believe he has "turned the corner." Nate and I are even beginning to allow ourselves to believe the same. There is an obvious difference in his appearance, behavior, and his emotional state from 24 hours ago. He just seems to feel so much better.

After the trauma of being wheeled out of the hospital and spending a lonely night in my own emotional distress it was a happy relief, indeed, to see him doing so much better today. Because of his progress we were able to attempt his first oral feeding which he promptly refused. Since normal techniques to encourage feeding can't be used on him (unwrapping, sitting him up) he just had another tube feeding and was quite satisfied. If he continues on this path we may be looking at a weekend discharge.



My mom and I are going back tonight to be present for the 9:00 p.m. ordeal (diaper change, repositioning, and feeding). Check on us tomorrow!

Thanks for reading (and praying)!

Update on Justin

Nate and I were able to spend about an hour or so with Justin before we left last night. He seemed to be doing well. He is down on room air, so no supplemental oxygen, but he is still on the high flow. So the cannula in his nose is still delivering air at a positive force they are just not having to add additional oxygen to that flow. As far as I know there have been no more spells of apnea so that is really good news. He got a couple of feedings in his tube yesterday and seemed to do really well after the feeds. I think he likes having some food in his tummy! Nate and I both got to hold him during his feeding last night and we had him sucking on his paci at the same time. Hopefully he will start to make the connection of being close to mommy, sucking, and getting a full tummy. If he does that should make breastfeeding somewhat easier to accomplish.

He has to be off the high flow cannula completely before he can attempt any oral feedings. If needed he can still be on a small amount of oxygen, just not the high flow. I know it sounds confusing, its a little easier if you can see him and the equipment to understand how it works. I am really hoping that he can make it home by this weekend. To do that he would need to be off the high flow oxygen by tomorrow. He then will have to show that he can eat by mouth with no respiratory distress for a full 24 hrs. The little guy has a lot of work to do in the next couple days so he can come home with us!

I made it through last night ok. It was probably one of the most difficult nights of my life. I'm just thankful that I do have a baby who will be coming home soon. I really feel for the women who had to do what I did, being wheeled out to the car with empty arms, come home and face the crib, and empty carseat, and put away the baby clothes that you had packed for the hospital but didn't get to use. And especially those women who lost the baby and don't get to count down the days until the baby is released from the hospital. I just keeping reminding myself that this is not the worst thing that could happen. We have been blessed, and will continue to be blessed. God has a plan for Justin, and I can't wait to raise him to help his discover and fulfill whatever that plan may be. Thank you all for your prayers!

Not Much Change

Justin is doing about the same today. He is still on the high flow oxygen and respiratory rate is still in the 70's to 90's range. He is still working hard to breathe and had one short episode of apnea this morning. The chest x-ray looks about the same as yesterday. His 24 hr blood culture was negative and we are waiting to get the final reading at 48 hrs. They are going to begin doing tube feedings today, so maybe he will get to see how it feels to have some food it that tummy! We are no where near being able to start bottle/breast feedings, so I guess that will just come with time.

I will be going home tonight. I will be discharged around 8 and then go spend some time with Justin before I go home. This will be difficult night for me, hopefully I will be able to sleep and not think about the fact that I had to leave him at the hospital. I am praying he will be home by this weekend. I'll update later.

A small setback . . . .

Justin had a small setback this afternoon. After seeming to do well on room air this morning when we went back to see him around 4pm he was back up to 30% oxygen and his respiratory rate was back in the 70's to 80's, sometimes as high as 100's. I could see that he was working much harder to breath and he was very easily "stressed". Even Nate and I just talking while standing beside him would send his respiratory rate higher. We were only able to touch his hands, not rubbing his tummy or head like we had been able to do earlier. We decided to bring the kids in to meet their new baby brother. They were only able to see him for about 3 minutes each, but I got some pics of them with Justin. Because of the setbacks I will not get to hold him tonight as I had hoped. The nurse also told me that I should be planning on him not getting to come home when I do.

A few hours later . . .


I just got back from the NICU, and I got to hold Justin!! The nurse was getting ready to weigh him (he weighed 5 lb 14 oz) and then let me hold him for about an hour. I was so excited and he really seemed to enjoy it as well. During the time I was holding him the nurse was able to get him back down to almost room air again. His respiratory rate was still high, up to the 90's at times, but he just seemed more relaxed and happy to be with Mommy. I think it really helped him to calm down. I think I will be able to sleep better tonight since I got to spend some time with him. They still don't think he will be coming home until later this week, but at least I got something positive out of the day!!


I will update in the morning with how he does through the night. Thanks for the prayers, they are working!





Look at my new baby brother!!



Jessi loves her new baby!

Justin is here!! He needs some extra prayers. . .

Justin Timothy arrived at 11:46 pm on Sept. 14, 2008. He weighed 6 lb 2 oz and is 18 inches long. The delivery was quick and easy, only about 4 pushes and he came out screaming! He did well for about the first 1 1/2 hrs. When I got to hold him for about 5 minutes I could tell he was grunting a lot when breathing. He was also very gaggy and he had no interest in trying to eat. After his bath the nurse was concerned with his breathing and color, he had become very pale and dusky and was also very lethargic. They checked his pulse ox (measures the oxygen saturation in his blood) and it was only 46%. It should be about 90%. The atmosphere of the room changed very quickly as they got him on oxygen and loaded him up to go to the NICU. Nate followed and said they were very good and fast. One of the NICU nurses met them in the hallway on the way to start getting history and report on him on the rest of the walk to the NICU. Once there he had about 3 people working on him and was stabilized quickly. He is being treated for pneumonia based on his chest X-ray, although they can't confirm for sure that it is pneumonia. He has been weaned down to room air today but is still on positive flow to help him out a little. I was able to see him this morning around 9 for the first time since he was born. We are not able to hold him yet because his respiratory rate and O2 sats are still to unstable. He has a feeding tube in that he will have to be feed through before we can attempt breastfeeding. It was good to see him this morning, but very frustrating to not be able to pick him up and hold him. Hope this makes sense, I am going on no sleep! I will continue to update the blog so check here for the latest news. I am praying that I will get to hold him tonight. Pray that he gets well enough to be able to go home with me. I don't think I can handle leaving him here alone . . . .

So sweet!!

Pics from this morning . . .

It's Time!!!!!

Well, after a few days of some kind of weird "stomach pain" I woke this morning to definite contractions. A little embarrassing that it's my fourth baby and I still wasn't sure if it was labor or not! We got to the hospital around 1 and in a triage room by 2pm. I was contracting about every 2-3 minutes and it didn't take long before I was really feeling them. Had my water broken around 5 and got the epidural around 8:30. Right now I am feeling pretty good (obviously) and just hanging out until Justin arrives. We are hoping for before midnight, but not sure, he only has an hour and a half left to make that deadline. I will update with pictures in the morning! Send some prayers our way that he won't have any breathing issues, I am 36 wks and 1 day.

Thank God for epidurals!!

First Soccer Game of the Season

This past Saturday was the first soccer game of the season. Jonathan is still on the wildcat team with Coach Jeff. He is now on the U7 league and this is a lot more like "real" soccer. They have a goalie, some kind of circle on the center of the field that has some rules, and if the ball goes out the kids have to throw it back in. As you can tell I really have no idea how the game of soccer works, I just like to watch Jonathan and Micah play. Anyway, we had no idea they were going into big time soccer now and we were not prepared, therefore did not prepare the boys. Because of rain, Labor Day and the coach being sick they only got in one practice before the first game. But, the kids did great! Jonathan needs to build up his confidence again but he overall had a good first game. Here are a few pics of the game.







I didn't post any pics of Micah. I figured Krista would want to do that so she couldn't say I stole one of the things she could blog about. She is such a blog slacker.

The Baby has dropped and I'm Nesting!! Let the countdown begin. . .

I will be officially 35 wks on Saturday!! I am happy to say that I am "tube" free and most likely will stay that way for the remainder of the pregnancy. I had an appt with urologist yesterday and he said that the hydronephrosis has not worsened. The kidney, although still backed up, does not appear to be under too much stress and is showing no signs of any damage. He said keep doing what I am doing, which is basically using pain meds to control pain and staying on my left side as much as possible to help keep pressure off the kidney. I sleep all night on my left side and try to have at least 2 hrs in the middle of the day to lay on my left side. I can definitely tell that I have an increase in nausea if I don't spend enough time off my feet and on my side, the nausea is a symptom of the kidney getting to backed up.

I have an appt with the midwife (the one who delivered all 3 of my other kids) on Friday. We may go ahead and schedule an amnio for late next week or Monday the 15th just so we have it if we need it. If things are staying like they are I may cancel the amnio and just wait to at least 37 wks to deliver, since 37 wks is considered full term. Either way, the end is in sight!!

I can tell that Justin has dropped, less heartburn but more trips to the bathroom with that big head on my bladder. I have been nesting for the last couple of weeks and finally have everything ready. The crib, pack and play, bassinet are all set up. Clothes are washed and put away, and the hospital bag is mostly packed. We bought a new car seat and stroller this past weekend and as soon as that is put together we will have everything we need. Now we just wait for Justin to make his appearance!!

Lunch with Nana

Today Jase got to have lunch at Nana's school for the first time! I had a doctors appt this morning and decided to stop by mom's school on the way home so that we could show Jase off since I think he has only been there once before. Well he did pretty good, even though he gave everyone his "look" that he has when someone he doesn't know talks to him. We went into the cafeteria to see someone and he could not stop looking at all the children eating. We decided to let him get a tray and eat a big boy lunch. He thought he was somebody big!! He didn't actually eat much, but he sure did have a good time!

I'm sitting at a big kid table!!

Look at me! I'm so big!